Those of us who live in the United States regard many of the crimes committed in the Middle East as barbaric or inhumane — sometimes we even view the punishments for those crimes with similar disdain. However, they happen for a reason. Women are still marginalized in every society in the world, and some male-dominated communities would rather perpetuate terrible violence against women to keep them subjugated than view them as equals. Why?
Family members who commit honor killings very rarely show remorse for what they have done. Not only do they believe their acts were necessary, but they see them as justified both by the laws of men and in the eyes of their faith.
The reasons for these crimes are varied: a woman might run away with a man after a previous marriage was arranged; a woman might appear in public without a chaperone; they may have been raped; they may be too friendly towards their male counterparts; they may have shown their faces in public rather than wear a hijab.
While many of us might see the impractical reality of these crimes, even psychologists have difficulty comprehending the human capacity for violence toward other members of a family. All animals, humans included, have an instinctual resolve to keep members of their own family safe from harm. Yet in these cases — some in which women did absolutely nothing wrong at all except wander into the wrong place at the wrong time — a parent’s love for a child might be overwritten by the urge to shirk an imagined dishonorable act.
That means the answer is deeply entrenched in Middle Eastern culture and practice. Honor killings occur, even today, because reputation is important to those who live in the Middle East, as is tradition. Men who live in these parts of the world epitomize the modern concept of fragile masculinity: they strive to be as masculine as possible, as rough and tough as they possibly can be. They will not tolerate disrespect from anyone, and certainly not from a member of the opposite sex.
This is because this facade of masculinity is viewed as a key to one’s success in life. Without it, failure would follow. Of course we know this is not true, but perception is reality to those who commit honor killings.
Unfortunately honor killings have been reported in the United States as well. Any Criminal defense attorney will tell you that statistics regarding these crimes aren’t necessarily falling as time goes on, and part of the reason is because radical elements of both conservative and liberal bias are on the rise all over the world — and the more radical a person’s beliefs, the more likely it is they will perpetuate this crime. What can we do to change the outcome? The answer to that question is simpler: we can start talking.